


Monster of Maybe

by CloudieAI



Category: Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: Consent Issues, Introspection, Kep and cobi have tense relationship of trust and hatred, ME - Freeform, SI5 (Wolf 359), Serial overuse of the word maybe, The whole time, They totally fucked, Violence, Was secretly fucking terrified of him, anyway, because social consent is real, but nonsexual, but with this internal dialogue, everyone in the fandom - Freeform, kepcobi if u squint, on the other hand, or if your definition of kepcobi matches mine, same Jacobi being witty and sarcastic and cruel and drastic, this is the hill i will die on, what if Jacobi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:29:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26811433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloudieAI/pseuds/CloudieAI
Summary: /I’m in your corner. No matter what/God - how pathetic.Why did he say that? More importantly - why does he mean it?When Maxwell joined SI5, Jacobi hadn’t yet mastered being a monster.
Kudos: 13





	Monster of Maybe

Jacobi falls in line with Maxwell, boots forward and hands neatly folded at the small of his back. Kepler is giving them the mission run-down and Jacobi has heard this twice already.

_I’m in your corner. No matter what._ God - how pathetic. He’s wearing his “I’m listening” face as he berates himself.

He hasn’t known her for a day. Why did he say that? More importantly - why does he mean it? 

  
Maybe there’s a simple reason. Maybe it’s the same reason he’s daydreaming while he’s supposed to be listening. Daydreaming about reaching over and taking her hand. Reaching out - in front of Kepler and Cutter and God and everyone - and clutching her hand.

God, why is he such a sap? Such a manic melancholic in his head? Looking for touches and looks that don’t bite or sting or scratch. These little reveries are going to get him killed.

He knows this. He knows better. So why? 

Maybe it’s that electric feeling. That boils his insides and leaves his skin raw and uninhabitable. That feeling when the mission goes from ‘under control’ to ‘command isn’t going to like this.’ From speckless suits and cool smirks to flecks of blood peppering his face. That feeling when Kepler’s hands plant themselves on his side and shove him away from the enemy blow he didn’t see coming. And how it feels the same when Kepler cups his hand around the nape of his neck as they walk. Walking through the Goddard halls, his touch still feels like danger. Like “run and hide and fight when they corner you because they always corner you in the end.” 

Jacobi glances at Kepler. So full of his own voice. His own authority. The measured power he wields over him. Over him and Maxwell, now. 

Jacobi chances a look at Cutter, fallen back into the shadows of the room. _I can’t believe I thought I’d met the most powerful man in the world at that shitty little bar._ Kepler was just the tip of the horrifying iceberg. 

Maybe that’s why Jacobi imagined a world where he could take Maxwell’s hand. Because Maxwell didn’t have a place in this frigid hierarchy of danger. Yet. She was largely unknown. But he knew that she knew about computers and language and robots that were basically people. 

Maybe when she feels the feeling she’ll have something else to say. After this mission, maybe, she’ll have felt what it’s like in SI-5. She’ll have felt it and she’ll have some kind of game plan. Some new way to survive each day.

Because Jacobi has been feeling the electric feeling for so long, he forgot that it’s name is fear.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for your time. 
> 
> Questions/Comments/Critiques are welcome
> 
> I’m sardonic-but-not-unkind on tumblr


End file.
